So I’m gradually getting more and more disenfranchised with the Boston dating scene. Meeting actually interesting people in this town is tough, especially if you’re a godless veggie liberal type who’s looking for such similar traits in someone else.
Over the past year, I’ve been on many “dates” with girls from a certain online dating website. And most of them turn out to be nice enough people, but few of them are interesting enough that I’d want to hang out in the medium-longer term (read: they have to be interesting enough that I’m not just thinking about Karin instead). Remove statistical noise, and the significantly large percentage who are just doing it to take their mind off an ex-boyfriend (thus not really looking for anything but friendship), and you’re left with quite a depressingly dull and boring Boston area dating scene. I’m actually not exaggerating, it really is that bad. I’m not quite at the point of focusing exclusively on longer distance stuff (read: obviously Californians), but it’s almost getting there.
The typical process goes something like: a). review matches. b). remove “matches”. c). contact the one (or maybe two) people I might have something in common with. d). wait a very long time before more “matches” appear. A “match”, as far as dating goes, is someone who is in their 20s, single, liberal/very liberal, non-religious, and who has interests beyond whatever they do for a living. Smoking is usually a deal breaker too. And although nerdy computery types are interesting, I usually find I get on better with lawyers, biologists/medics, artists, writers, activists, etc. Someone with a brain, but preferably not someone who does exactly the same as that which I do for a living.
Although I have many friends with differing viewpoints to my own, the religion and politics things are really areas I’m pretty inflexible on if I’m honest about it (and, if they’re honest, so are most girls) when it comes to relationships. My reasoning comes down to longer term viability, family, things of this nature, where I know such differences have a strong potential to become intractable problems. And anyway, you’d think I’d find what I’m looking for in Boston and Cambridge of all places, but it feels like dating in any major city – everyone’s too busy, these people exist, but you just never find them.
I’m about done with it
Jon.
Tags: Brave New Jon
Why not just get into the spirit of things and enjoy a mindless shagfest?
You can find a soulmate when you’re 30 !
What are you really looking to get out of it?